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Nobody ever gets me flowers…

Nobody ever gets me flowers…

Goddamnit not again.

Goddamnit not again.

i will never understand people who only order boneless wings

hopalonggretzky:

i don’t care that they’re cheaper, you’re an unequivocal fool.

Because it’s cooler than ordering chicken nuggets, which is what they really want.

sn00kered:

Chipotle is good but it ain’t that good 

sn00kered:

Chipotle is good but it ain’t that good 

sexpigeon:

Lotion where the soap should be, and now you’re slippery and unclean.

sexpigeon:

Lotion where the soap should be, and now you’re slippery and unclean.

sexpigeon:

waluiqi:

tryna post a selfie like

image

You found it. 

Jesus, more hobbledehoys!

You can’t leave me alone with them, they’re all over the place like a nest of pigs!
Why can’t they all just go away?!

Clothes

Clothes

asks:
Today I got this gem from a guy on tinder: "Wanna know how I'm like a Malaysian Airlines flight? Because I'd go down on you"

straightwhiteboystexting:

NO NO NO NON NONONONONONOONONONO

How could you say no?

samwritesabook:

Myron & E- Broadway (Official Video)